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((this is in regards to the Pressed Journal articles, written by Jameila, and posted on DMF's realm forum. There are four in total at this time, on page 1 and page 2 if you search. Please check them out if you haven't already. They're fun and they deserve a looksee by this community as well.))

*copies of the original letter has been posted on city bulletin boards, as if to ensure that the message not be destroyed by the first person it was sent to.*



To the Editor of the Pressed Journal:


On behalf of the Broken Keel staff—the one who is enslaved and therefore cannot write this on their own, of course—I, Sastri Rae’lyn, would like to thank you for your creative ideas. In lieu of them, however false they were, the actually very free and healthy Keel staff (huh…imagine that) has decided to take some inspiration, straight from your articles. We plan on using them in the way I am sure you will be happy to see...

Picture this! The stage is set. Your imagination, brought to life, standing before you, real and three dimensional, no longer make believe characters, confined to page, but for one night, your own personal moving, breathing, montage of sin, smiling back at you in such lifelike ways that any sensible and honorable writer—such as yourself–would only dare to dream. Dress up to match the theme, if you will. And you will read what the theme is, when you glimpse again upon your divine words:

*Various newspaper cutouts have seemingly been pasted in random angles onto the page and highlighted, but all sentences are doubtlessly from the Pressed Journal*


Quote:
…So it was with bored curiosity that I made my way to 'The Keel', tavern come eatery owned by Mr. Sastri Rae'lyn. The first thing that struck me was the dank, squalid atmosphere of the place, not unlike the feel you get when you walk into a brothel…



Quote:
…I wondered what the exact appeal of the place was, I assumed it was something to do with the prostitutes the owner seemed to encourage having about the place….



Quote:
…And when I was finally served, it was by a tearful, terrified young thing that claimed she was a horribly abused slave that had no will of her own.


Quote:
…He revealed today his dirty dealings and constant struggle against his perverse desires. I spoke to him while he brazenly watched one of his young, innocent slaves drink a spiked alcoholic concoction. He smiled, pleased, at his own decadence while he beat the girl….



Quote:
…But not for Sastri Rae'lyn, formally accused of Treason by both Alliance and Horde. He revealed today his dirty dealings …


Quote:
dirty dealings...



Quote:
dirty dealings...



Quote:
…With such a nefarious owner, one can hardly be surprised….



Now...you and I are both reasonable people, and I'm sure you know that the Keel is none of this. Let’s be honest. You needed ratings for a dying editorial, so you embellished a bit, and that's fine. A little publicity never hurt anyone, and those bold enough can lie their way to the top. I hope you go far, even if your credibility may lie in tatters beneath you as you soar. I am sure those who partake in the Keel’s true tavern atmosphere every week will vouch for me that I am a man of goodwill and good humor, and so it is with that humor in mind that I will humor you. So much will I humor you, that I will transform the Keel for one night and one night only, into the cesspit that you so yearned for.

Absinthe fountains, peacebloom pipes, shooting galleries of crystallized mana, leather whips and collars, slaves and their sex. Wouldn’t you love to bear witness? Would you not squirm in erotic anticipation, to see these seeds, from your seedy brain, bear such juicy fruit?

Well, don’t ever claim the Keel as the establishment to disappointment, because just in case you are low on coins that day or may find yourself without transportation, we are giving you an honorary special guest invitation, paying for a horse drawn carriage to take you to us, and handling the cost of all your indulgences upon arrival. This, on the night that we put your madness to the test. This, on the night we let the deviance of your design run rampant.

Don’t be shy! Come see what the Pressed Journal, your respected piece of fiction, is capable of erecting. Can you really pass up the chance for free drinks, free food, free everything? Of course you can't! There is nothing wrong with a little splurge here and there in your honor.

Why would we do this? To thank you for doing what you do. You would certainly agree there is no better way to thank you than with prostitutes and sex slaves. Hats off to you, Queen of the Pen, and may this be as glorious a fantasy as you had fantasized. Perhaps you may one day write romance novels, clearly your true passion, but until then, do keep believing that you are writing “what you see”, because on this night and this night only, you will finally be able to truly do just that. But for every other night, and for every other article you scribble…

Do keep hallucinating us all up some more lovely treats to read.

Yours truly,


S. Rae'lyn
Drug Addict/Dealer
Slave Trafficker
Staff Spanker
Broken Keel



((OOC:

For those wondering, yes, this is open to the public.

Where will it be: Ratchet's Broken Keel

What day will it be held: Friday, April 1

What time? 21:00 Game hours.

Dress for the occasion. Characters can show up in costumes as slaves, drug lords, prostitutes, or anything they think might match the theme described. Succubi and Incubi must be kept on a leash. Costumes must consist of at least thirty ounces of fabric.

Disclaimer: There will be NO pornography and NO cybor. This will be a clean dirty party, yet still, any players who show up are warned before entering of mild suggestive content. This is STRICTLY an in character tavern event. Absolutely NO OOC content will be tolerated in /s or /y, and if I or others feel that you are going over the line, we will handle it accordingly. At all times, we will adhere to WoW's code of conduct.

You're encouraged to download GHI (Gryphonheart Items) before this event as most of the grabbag gifts, game prizes, novelty items and food and drinks will be created through this mod. Link available here: http://wow.curse.com/downloads/wow-addo ... 08607.aspx

At all times the mainstay is to have fun, but participants must remember not to let it get out of hand.))

[ Last edited by Sastri on Sat Mar 26, 2011 2:57 pm, edited 3 times in total. ]


[Eltharis Sunglaive] says: Sastri...you better not have sex with my runeblade...."


A writer values a compliment even when it comes from a source of doubtful competency. --- Mark Twain
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((Sastri! :O You're running a brothel?! Oh the shame!....

:lol: I think if Keilara read that article she'd bust a gut laughing. But at the challenge of a dress up, I could so see her come in as a prime courtesan, all glitzy and elegant. I doubt Sastri'd recognize her.

Sounds like a great idea! :) ))
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*Iz amused*.))
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Whoa, my goblin is a slave dealer, this is just so perfect!
Dereck: Roleplaying with your chars is like playing Call of Cthulu. There's no health bar, only sanity bar.
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see you April 1st then! Dressed up and ready for sin.
[Eltharis Sunglaive] says: Sastri...you better not have sex with my runeblade...."


A writer values a compliment even when it comes from a source of doubtful competency. --- Mark Twain
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Sastri wrote:
see you April 1st then! Dressed up and ready for sin.



Reading the description I shouldn't dress up too much.
You're not attending a prom.

Forsaken rp is not dead! It's undead...
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you know what I mean ;)
[Eltharis Sunglaive] says: Sastri...you better not have sex with my runeblade...."


A writer values a compliment even when it comes from a source of doubtful competency. --- Mark Twain
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Just love the idea! *ponders on which char to take to such a sinful party*
To conquer death you only have to die.
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Slightly mature post.

Just a recap:

Normally, the Broken Keel does not force people to download GHI (Gryphonheart Items) to interact and enjoy Keel nights (every Friday at 21:00 game time) but in this particular night, the items will be heavily GHI based, as while we tried to get Blizzard to agree with us that they should make an in game recipe for a drink called The Beavershot, they did not agree to our insisting that it would cater well to their marketing demographic.

So we had to make due with our own creativity--or lack thereof--and have spammed our GHI backpack with new item after new item. Drink and food alike.

You will also receive a goodie bag at the door. Pink for girl, blue for boy. Mix and match for more added amusement!

There will be games, like spin the bottle, seven minutes in heaven, musical lap dance, and bouncin the bed.

So it is again recommended that you download GHI for at least this night, and if this addon interferes with your raiding mods or any of your mods, you can shut them all off just for that night. Trust me, you won't need Deadly Boss Mods to horse around in the Keel. Unless you piss Sastri off.


Gryphonheart Items recommended version download link: http://wow.curse.com/downloads/wow-addo ... 08607.aspx

[ Last edited by Sastri on Sat Mar 26, 2011 3:10 pm, edited 1 time in total. ]


[Eltharis Sunglaive] says: Sastri...you better not have sex with my runeblade...."


A writer values a compliment even when it comes from a source of doubtful competency. --- Mark Twain
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Sastri wrote:
You will also receive a goodie bag at the door. Pink for girl, blue for boy. Mix and match for more added amusement!


If I get handed a blue bag, my Orc will have some serious complaining to do to whichever Elf gave it to her.

Especially since people keep calling her Sir. :evil:


Sastri wrote:
Trust me, you won't need Deadly Boss Mods to horse around in the Keel. Unless you piss Sastri off.

Or try sending him to bed :D

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